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In this unprecedented era of mass incarceration, prison reform and prisoner reentry have taken on great salience. Many jurisdictions are reformulating policy to keep people out of prisons and under correctional control in their home communities (Pew Center on the States, 2009; Mobley, 2011; Sentencing Project, 2014). The public safety implications of this move are a major concern. The compromise that seems to be taking shape is one in which an expanded “treatment” or “rehabilitative” side of corrections arises to bolster the more punitive and enduring incapacitation side. Both sides would share the goal of supporting “offenders” in desistance from crime. Many scholars of the desistance process point to the important role played by formerly incarcerated persons acting as prisoner mentors and rehabilitation program staff (Maruna, 2001; Maruna and LeBel, 2009; Harris, 2011; Calverley, 2012). Ex-cons, ex-gang members and ex-addicts appear as highly valued partners in this emergent correctional scheme. With such large numbers of “ex’s” moving from custodial environments to mainstream society, we might stop a moment to reflect on why proportionally so few step forward as mentors. In this paper, I will share my thoughts, or rather, my thoughts and feelings on this important topic. I offer up my emotions, in particular the emotion of shame, because I believe that shame stemming from my own incarceration experience has motivated my self-exclusion from much prison-related work, including work as a prison volunteer mentor.

What follows revolves around a first person account of my experience of trying to become a prison volunteer. The …